billboard BREAKDOWN - hot 100 - march 6, 2021

…okay, I’ve gone on for the past few weeks about how I keep expecting a major chart shift and don’t want to normalize the weird crap we’ve been dealing with, but we’ve now had a few weeks in a row where the Hot 100 has returned to some veneer of predictable behavior… might as well treat something as routine, if not normal, that’s a balance right?

Well, if that’s the case, I still think the top 10 is going to shift in a big way pretty soon, and we should start with ‘drivers license’ by Olivia Rodrigo still at #1… and I dunno, I still think this is in more precarious straits than it might seem. Yeah, the radio surge is absolutely there, but the sales and streaming are dropping, and that makes it vulnerable, especially when I see more consistent strength from ‘Up’ by Cardi B now at #2, which is bigger on streaming, but just lagging on sales and the radio. But the greater disorder comes with ‘Go Crazy’ by Chris Brown and Young Thug suddenly bouncing up to #3, as from out of nowhere it suddenly got a boost on sales and streaming courtesy of a remix, which to me seems like a last-ditch attempt from their label to give this just a bit of traction before it collapses outright. This puts it over the remix of ‘34+35’ by Ariana Grande with Doja Cat and Megan Thee Stallion at #4, but only barely as this has more sales and streaming, but is seeing its radio stall out. It at least kept above ‘Blinding Lights’ by The Weeknd at #5, which looks to be slowly leaving but for yet another small sales boost… and that probably kept it above ‘Save Your Tears’ by The Weeknd at #6, which might have more streaming but still is short on sales and the radio! Then we have ‘Mood’ by 24kGoldn and iann dior still at #7 even as it’s fading consistently, but it likely only held its position because ‘Calling My Phone’ by Lil Tjay and 6LACK dropped off the debut to #8 - streaming is enormous, but without sales or the radio it’s not going to stay this high much longer. Then we had ‘positions’ by Ariana Grande bump up a spot to #9, but that’s more because ‘Levitating’ by Dua Lipa and DaBaby is just falling faster on the radio to #10.

And while we’re here, the losers and dropouts almost seem kind of expected at this point. In the latter category we got the expected drop for ‘Big, Big Plans’ by Chris Lane, ‘Happy Does’ by Kenny Chesney, and ‘Back To The Streets’ by Saweetie and Jhene Aiko, along with ‘Before You Go’ by Lewis Capaldi making its quiet exit, likely just on the borderline of clinching a year-end list spot but potentially falling out - good. And the losers don’t surprise me - ‘Cover Me Up’ by Morgan Wallen faded to 95, ‘Afterglow’ by Ed Sheeran slid to 94 - that song just got no promotion - ‘hole in the bottle’ by Kelsea Ballerini looks to make its exit at 69, ‘Long Live’ by Florida Georgia Line lost all of its album boost to 60, ‘Body’ by Megan Thee Stallion looks to be rotating out at 41 - I still like the song, don’t @ me - and ‘Holy’ by Justin Bieber is starting its descent to 27 - good to see.

Now we actually didn’t get any returning entries this week, but there were a few gains. Nothing good in country, though, as 'Good Time’ by Niko Moon rose to 25 and ‘What’s Your Country Song’ by Thomas Rhett hit 44, and while we’re on songs I don’t like, ‘Opp Stoppa’ by YBN Nahmir and 21 Savage hit 78 off its return last week. But I can’t really complain about the rest of our gains here: off the debut last week ‘Heartbreak Anniversary’ by Giveon rose to 63, ‘La Noche de Anoche’ by Bad Bunny and ROSALIA is at 58, ‘No More Parties’ by Coi Leray got the Lil Durk remix to rise to 32, and ‘Best Friend’ by Saweetie and Doja Cat hit 28 - it’s going to be a solid mid-tier hit, and I’m generally fine with that, good stuff.

And I guess that takes us to our pretty reasonable list of new arrivals - I’m used to the previous sections being a bit longer - so let’s get started with…

99. ‘Track Star’ by Mooski - trap and R&B artist who gets traction on Tiktok, we’ve been down this road before… and wow, that is a squeaky chipmunk sample lingering around the mix, coupled with some truly bad percussion mix; not only is the bass swamping the mix, it’s mastered in a way that it’s blowing out part of the cymbal and snare! And that’s not even getting into the issues of structure where Mooski can barely stay on flow as he rambles through a Rod Wave / Roddy Ricch impression without the soul or tightness, just great. I guess the most I can say about it is that the song feels somewhat focused in exploring the girl who runs away from commitment and then exposes all of their drama, but it’s not like he’s self-aware about how he’s exposing all of the same stuff in his art, and the fact that we don’t get more of a picture of him really does detract from how much likable he can be. So maybe an idea that could have worked, but the really shoddy execution doesn’t help - this feels like it was built for a few seconds on Tiktok off the hook and nothing else.

97. ‘Hello’ by Pop Smoke ft. A Boogie wit da Hoodie - you know, I could have sworn that I had covered this song when I had reviewed Pop Smoke’s posthumous album bomb, but it turns out I was wrong - this had was now included on the deluxe edition release! But let’s be real, the majority of you have not thought about A Boogie wit da Hoodie in a while, given his content is the definition of forgettable, and it almost seemed like as soon as other artists slipped into his lane with better content and flows, he started slipping out of people’s memories. And I’m not sure this is the song anyone wants to bring him back to the forefront - aside from the pretty spare piano and trap drill percussion, this is not a good song by any means, and the late Pop Smoke doesn’t help it. Yeah, the hook is kind of punchy but not nearly as good as the best on the album, and his verse features both the lines ‘she off the white, talking Demi Lovato’ - which given what we know about her issues with drugs feels very clickbait and including it posthumously is icky… and then comes the line ‘Hitting like Ike, singing like Tina’; yeah, I didn’t give Jay-Z a pass when he pulled this shit, you don’t get one either. But then there’s A Boogie… who fumbles his rhymes within the first four bars, tries to flex and complain about women and doesn’t really succeed at either, and then he outright admits that none of his girls are his but then references one you don’t know who he says is. But I think what’s most awkward is how he openly mentions how if Pop Smoke was alive, they’d run New York… right before Pop Smoke’s hook, which doesn’t fit any vibe or match with his content. So yeah, I’ve been forgiving on the Pop Smoke songs assembled posthumously, but this is by far one of the worst - next!

96. ‘The Business’ by Tiesto - well, about time we got this one - given that it’s been charting worldwide and is one of Tiesto’s biggest mainstream crossover hits to date, it may have only been a matter of time. But then you go back and realize that Tiesto’s chart success in the US has been kind of spare, nearly always with another artist and the last considerable hits he had were ‘Red Lights’ and ‘Wasted’ back in 2014! The fact that he’s back at all kind of shocks me, his usual brand of EDM hasn’t been popular in years… until you realize that with the pitched down vocals from James Bell, this is going for the same sort of driving deep house that we saw with ‘Roses’ or recently the ‘goosebumps’ remix. But here’s the odd thing: even though I wouldn’t say Tiesto has anything close to a good track record in singles or albums, this is surprisingly credible. I like how the rougher bass texture creeps into augment the groove, I like how the synths accentuate the dour, minor-key vibe, and even if I don’t think the mixing is all that great, this is one of those songs where the bleakness is mirrored effectively in the content and vibe. Hell, you could probably slot this into the realm of angry, brooding dance cuts and it would work well… so yeah, even if there’s not a place open where this could go off, I’ll get behind this - solid stuff.

92. ‘Made For You’ by Jake Owen - well, about time we got this one too - I was saying Jake Owen should have released this single back in 2019 when he put out the album that didn’t do as well as it should have, but it turns out this is actually even older, dating to his self-titled EP in 2018. I guess I’m happy he’s finally pushing it years late, because it’s a really solid song, one of the best he’s put out in recent years! The funny thing is that, for the most part, it’s a pretty simple love song - listing a number of things that were made to go together, Jake Owen says he was made for his partner, that’s about as far as it goes, leaning heavily on his charisma to carry the song - but the fine details are what make it click, how the percussion and groove are so gentle to match with the binaural synchronized guitars and touches of organ, and the sense of quiet warmth that make Owen’s work so damn inviting and likable. No, it’s not doing anything exceptional, but it’s really damn solid at what it delivers - definitely recommended, glad it’s finally getting pushed.

90. ‘ZAZA’ by 6ix9ine - I don’t care - and I have to ask, who still does? 6ix9ine got his #1 with Nicki Minaj last year… and ever since then with every flailing attempt to call attention to himself, 6ix9ine falls increasingly flat. Did this only get in the news because of his attempted fight with Meek Mill, because if so you all realize you’re only playing into his hand, right - leave him alone and wait until he runs out of label money to burn and he faces the consequences of not being able to afford bodyguards. And that’s relevant because this entire song, floating on a bunch of breathy flutes and a weirdly underweight beat, is an extended diss to Lil Durk, specifically by mocking his friends like King Von who have been killed in recent months. And the fact that this little soundcloud waifu hasn’t suffered a very bloody accident tells me that Lil Durk knows that 6ix9ine is obviously working for the feds and is trying to spur other rappers into confrontation. It reminds me of when Troy Ave dissed Capital Steez - this doesn’t make you sound edgy or dangerous or even much of a villain, it makes you an obvious opp who is scummy and beneath contempt. None of this trash is worth anyone’s time - let him be seen and then seen no more.

88. ‘Chicken Tendies’ by Clinton Kane - okay, this is interesting: I remember seeing the name Clinton Kane associated with Martin Garrix, but this solo cut looks like it’s based off of TikTok - shocker - and it’s different than the Dominic Fike song of a similar name… and I’m not sure that’s a good or bad thing. Clinton Kane’s throatier tones remind me a lot of the acoustic singer-songwriters that came in the wake of Ed Sheeran like James Arthur, Dean Lewis, and Lewis Capaldi, and that’s not really a compliment as it looks like this song grabbed the drums and millennial whoop backing vocals from the early 2010s. But for a change of pace, I actually think they kind of work here for an interesting reason: as much as this might read like a song pining over an ex and wishing her well, Kane actually described how this song was inspired by losing his mom to religious fundamentalism, and that fits the less intimate delivery and is mostly matched by the right lyrical details. It’s also pretty unique - I can’t recall that many songs about this topic, and I can imagine anyone who has seen a friend or family member drift towards evangelicalism or hardline conspiracy theories can sympathize with this sense of loss that feels beyond your control. So yeah, I’m pretty surprised how this turned out - I have no idea if it’ll stick around, but I’m fine with being here.

67. ‘Hit Bout It’ by Lil Yachty ft. Kodak Black - you know, Lil Yachty, when you go on a tirade about how you’re so much better than many of your peers currently out right now, the sort of challenge that made me snicker immediately and then follow it with ‘okay, prove it’, I did not expect the follow-through to be a single with Kodak Black. Apparently this is tied into an upcoming project called Michigan Boy Boat, where Yachty was going to work with a bunch of Detroit MCs… so obviously your introduction to the project is with a rapper from Florida, and the song is fucking terrible. Why are you riding this weedy synth reject from Whole Lotta Red and bringing no power or intensity to ride off this clanky percussion and bells, especially when you can’t rid the beat for shit as you overstuff bars with syllables and no sense of coherent flow? It’s a horrible sign when Kodak Black is barely mixed properly on top of the beat, and he sounds considerably better than you do! And none of the content is worth caring about - flexing, fucking women, killing people, the works - but I’m more distracted that Yachty thinks his 6’5’’ homie in his crew could play center in basketball! What I don’t understand is that Yachty’s weird sing-rapping was at least somewhat distinctive and could probably work in this environment, but his trap material is so dour and miserable and not playing to his strengths that this feels like a total dud. So yeah, this is bad - next!

61. ‘test drive’ by Ariana Grande - so here’s something I really don’t like from the deluxe reissue method: if you can still work great songs on your album that you haven’t released as singles, the deluxe release tells me you have no interest in really doing so. And that baffles me for Ariana Grande here - you’re just going to leave ‘off the table’ with The Weeknd, ‘nasty’, ‘pov’, you’re not going to even try to push any of them? i know your team has been mixed at best with singles since at least Dangerous Woman, but this just feels like she’s leaving money and career longevity on the table! But fine, here’s a cut from the deluxe reissue that apparently was going to be on the album instead of ‘love language’… and in comparison with how Dua Lipa dropped a dud last week, this seems pretty decent and maybe should have been on the album proper. Yeah, the skittering percussion feels undercooked, but this could probably join ‘motive’ as one of the songs that has an actual sense of tempo and the super sweet vocal arrangement is a natural fit opposite the flutters of strings… until the song ends just after two minutes! There’s no bridge, there’s no solo, just after the second verse the song stops abruptly and I instantly get why it was left off the album proper - it’s not even finished. So I’ll ask again: is pushing this really worth moving on the other, better songs on positions - really?

54. ‘Telepathia’ by Kali Uchis - I remember getting so much backlash when I reviewed Isolation back in 2018 - I don’t think I pronounced her name correctly, and me only being lukewarm on the project that got so much critical acclaim meant that I was on the outside looking in. And now given that we’re looking at a single that went viral on Spanish language TikTok, from an album that I’ll admit I did not hear a ton of buzz, I felt even further out of the loop than normal. And thus with this song… honestly, still kind of lukewarm, but I hear the appeal. The synths and acoustics feel gauzy and oddly underweight and they clash opposite the hazy vocal layering in an odd way, which is kind of a shame because the supple underlying groove is really nice and even before the song goes into a warped breakdown to close things out, it does somewhat match the dreamlike feel of being so infatuated that just thinking about them is like making love telepathically. Honestly, it just kind of reminds me of the issues I had with Isolation - she’s a potent performer, but the production never felt quite as refined as it could to go further, and I’m also left thinking this song could afford to be a bit more languid or organic. But then I realize I’m just imagining a Jhene Aiko song, who I think delivers this particular sound just way more consistently, especially off of her underrated 2017 album Trip. Still, this is likable - I get why it works, maybe it might grow on me.

53. ‘Clouds’ by NF - I replied to a tweet from a fellow music critic just over a week ago surrounding why more critics don’t talk about NF, where I highlighted he makes boring, underwritten that can’t back up its attempts at bombast and thus isn’t that interesting, especially when I can’t remember any of his bars; I’ve called him the Christian version of Logic before, but at least Logic can have fun! But hey, I get why there’s a ton of white guys who adore this approach to rap music, so here’s a cut from his upcoming mixtape later this month… and here’s the thing: a few years back in this series I did say NF’s song ‘The Search’ was pretty decent in paying off its crescendo and bombast even if I thought the ‘self-aware’ content ran out of steam about a third of the way through. Well, this is that… but in prepping people for that upcoming mixtape and playing into how great he is, the song winds up being a lot less likable. For one the pacing is a total mess, feeling very stop-and-start and not really allowing a significant build melodically, and even if you have all of that bombast, it starts feeling increasingly flat when your bragging is increasingly undercooked, lacking detail, and all about the charts. I’m not hearing the ‘genius’ here by any means - yes, the bars are well-constructed, but this doesn’t even have the introspection into his depression or even braggadocious bars that stand out, more just assuming greatness by birthright and sales figures. At least later stage Eminem is creative and will go down weird lyrical rabbit holes, but this can’t even take that risk, so it feels hollow and antiseptic, and can’t back up its attempts at bombast. I’m not saying it’s bad, but it sure is forgettable - and for a song trying to go this hard, that might be the bigger failure.

Granted, this week it’s not even close to the worst here: ‘ZAZA’ by 6ix9ine is getting that, and I shouldn’t have to justify why, but we have a tie for Dishonourable Mention: ‘Hit Bout It’ by Lil Yachty and Kodak Black, and ‘Hello’ by Pop Smoke and A Boogie - really, on any given day all three of these could be the worst. The best… yeah, ‘Made For You’ by Jake Owen is probably the best here, but Honourable Mention I also feel like giving a tie and it might be surprising: ‘The Business’ by Tiesto, and ‘Chicken Tendies’ by Clinton Kane; what can I say, they both mostly work! Next week… I just have no idea, because I’m not seeing the obvious chart breakthrough, but we’ll have to see.